100 Cases Of Marauder Mischief
by I Double Dare You
Summary: 100 drabbles concerning the mischievous Marauders, following them from first year and into their post-Hogwarts lives. Follow our favourite trouble makers apart from the Weasley twins, of course through their adventures, laughs and trials that all resulted in friendships that should have lasted forever. In later chapters, mainly SBRL with some LEJP.
1. Introduction and First Year

Title: **100 Cases of Marauder Mischief**

Summary: 100 drabbles centred mostly around Sirius/Remus, starting with their first year and following the mischievous Marauders throughout their schooling and to their post-Hogwarts lives. SBRL LEJP

Notes: I've discovered that I have trouble writing short fics so I've gathered 100 prompts from the sirius_remus100 community over at LJ and from my mind, and used them to write 100 drabbles. Most will be light hearted, fluffy, humourous where I can, and centered around S/R. Some will be M, just because that's how Moony and friends roll. Also, they begin with the Marauders' first year and progress from there. PS: This intro counts as one so total word count will add up to 10 000. Thank you so much for reading and I would love any comments!

So excited!

OOOOOOOOO

**Beginnings**

Remus' mother hugged him tightly and he inhaled her comforting smell, his face pressed into her coat. The Hogwarts Express hissed steam as more children appeared and she reluctantly relinquished her skinny, worried, but obviously thrilled son. Remus' father smiled down at him anxiously.

"You'll be careful, won't you, son?"

"Of course, Dad."

Mrs Lupin leaned down to peck her young son on the forehead, her blue eyes meeting soft brown. "Remember, this is a new beginning. Make the most of it, chéri."

Remus' hands were shaking when he boarded the train but his mother's words gave him determination.

OOOOOOOOO

**Family**

The Black family stood silent and still as the two adults observed the commoners around them with a moue of disdain. The exception was the oldest Black boy who grinned madly and itched to leave. His mother had other ideas. His arm was gripped cruelly and identical grey eyes met as he turned.

"You will not associate with filth. You will do as we discussed and make your family proud."

Sirius grimaced and nodded, relieved when she let him go. Sirius Black did not wave goodbye like the other children waved to their families when the train pulled away.

OOOOOOOOO

**Forever**

The meeting of James Potter and Sirius Black would prove to be a moment which decided the fate of four boys, destined to become friends.

The four didn't seem remarkable at first. The chubby, anxious boy called Peter, watched James and Sirius with awe, while the quiet, scrawny boy by the window watched surreptitiously from behind his book. It would take months – _years_, even – for the four boys to come to trust and love each other like brothers. But it only took a moment for two dark-haired mischief makers to decide that they would be best friends forever.

OOOOOOOO

**Colour**

Sirius stared up in delighted disbelief at the crimson banner hanging above his head. But rather than the lion giving him courage, he felt anxiety curdle in his stomach. The banner should have been emerald and the lion a serpent.

"I can't believe it either."

Sirius glanced down at the boy next to him. Remus Lupin, he remembered.

Another conspiratorial whisper. "Gryffindors are supposed to be brave – I don't feel very brave."

Sirius saw the hands shaking in the boy's lap but said nothing. No one noticed when two boys' equally shaking hands gripped each other.

"Neither do I."

OOOOOOOOO

**Mouse**

"Professor McGonogall scares me a little."

"So do a million other things, Pete."

"But she's so strict; we won't be able to do any pranks when she's around."

"Is that so...?"

Remus wished Pete hadn't said that; doubts only presented challenges to James and Sirius. He determinedly kept his eyes fixed to his textbook at breakfast, not looking up at the teacher's table once. In contrast, the other three were fixated on the Head of Gryffindor House, waiting for her to take a sip of her pumpkin juice and discover the red and gold mouse swimming around in it.

OOOOOOO

**Punishment**

Remus had wanted to cry when he'd gotten his first detention. He was privileged just being here and now he feared expulsion.

James had only asked him, in the most innocent of tones, what would be an ingredient _not_ to add to the Boil Cure potion the class was making. Remus wasn't to know that James would throw said ingredient into a Slytherin's cauldron.

But then Sirius peered over the cauldron he was scrubbing and winked at him. "It's real handy having a bookworm for a friend."

Suddenly, detention with the three boys didn't seem like a punishment anymore.

OOOOOOOO

**Vow**

"Brilliant, Remus, just brilliant!" Sirius beamed, "Snivellus should have that pumpkin stuck on his head until lunch."

"You're the one who cast the spell. I only told you about it." Remus mumbled, a smile tugging his lips.

"Bollocks, everyone thinks you're Mr. Goody Two Shoes but you're just as devious as James when he's stalking Evans."

"Hey!"

Sirius ignored the bespectacled boy's objection and slung a friendly arm around Remus' shoulders. Remus flinched and Sirius hastily removed his arm, feeling anger rise within him.

He'd seen the bruises and he vowed to stop whoever was doing this to Remus.

OOOOOOOO

**Angel**

Snow fell thick and fast on Hogwarts' grounds and James and Sirius pushed each other down into it, Sirius succeeding in kicking icy snow up James' robes, who emitted a girlish shriek. In the following scuffle, they knocked into Remus and Peter and they all collapsed in a laughing heap.

Sirius and James continued to tussle until they saw Remus moving his arms and legs in the snow rhythmically.

Remus grinned. "It's a snow angel - a muggle winter tradition."

The three boys grinned, flopped down beside him and four angels rested peacefully beside each other in the white snow.

OOOOOOOO

**Lies**

"Where've you been?"

"My mum had another relapse but she should be okay for a couple of weeks."

"Is she getting any better?"

"... The Healers think she'll never be completely healed."

"Is she dying?"

"Let him be, Peter. Hey, Remus, you missed me turning that slimy Nott's hair red and gold – with sparkles!"

Remus smiled wanly and listened to James retell his victorious conquering of Nott The Slimy, while trying to ignore the way his wounds stung and how his stomach churned, sickened by guilt and lies. If James and Sirius exchanged knowing glances, they went unnoticed by him.

OOOOOOOOOO

**White**

Sirius tried not to notice it. The envy that flared in his chest when his friends were reunited with their parents at the station made him feel even worse. James' mother fussed over the boy while his father grinned proudly at him; Remus' mother held the sickly boy closely while his father looked on anxiously; and Peter's mother attacked the protesting blonde boy with kisses.

Sirius looked back at his friends as he was hastily steered away by his cold, silently disapproving mother and couldn't help but think about how really, he and his friends were Black and White.

OOOOOOO


	2. Second Year

**Breathe**

Sirius heart thumped madly as he caught sight of the train. He searched frantically for a head of messy black hair before his mother could catch him for another 'talking to'. _There! _

He rushed forward, heart beating, breath caught in his throat and if he'd been weaker he would have been crying. All that he could do when he embraced James was breathe a sigh of relief.

It felt like he'd spent his whole holidays holding his breath, waiting for his second year to arrive and now he was taking the first breath for months. He was alive again.

OOOOOOO

**Planning**

"We could get him to admit it himself. You know, trick him into telling the truth."

"Really, James, have you ever seen anyone trick Remus into admitting anything before?"

"Right, fair point. What if we caught him at it, follow him when he sneaks off on the full moon?"

"But what if he... changed when we followed him. Werewolves don't know friends when they're – they're transformed, do they?"

"Cool it, Pete. We wouldn't actually stick around."

"We should just tell him straight out what we know."

"Well if he goes off his rocker, this is all your fault, Sirius."

OOOOOOOO

**Singing**

It started with Lily charming her radio to tune into Muggle stations. Sirius, fascinated with everything Muggle, had 'borrowed' it (or so he'd assured Remus) one night and had heard a song by someone named Frank Sinatra.

Everyone (Marauders excluded) was rather shocked when one day during breakfast, Severus Snape leaped onto the Slytherin table and began tap dancing while singing 'My Way', by Frank Sinatra.

Sirius had purposefully left out the transfiguration of the boy's voice and Snape's cheeks glowed red when his voice cracked on high notes, declaring his late onset into puberty to the laughing students.

OOOOOOOOO

**Collapse**

Remus' knees hit the wooden floor of their dormitory. His voice cracked desperately and his whole body trembled violently. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have lied, I shouldn't even be here but I wanted to learn so badly and I'd never had friends before -"

"We're Marauders, Remus – the four of us. We don't lie to each other."

In two strides James had crossed the room, crouched down and embraced the shaking werewolf.

"And Marauders don't let other Marauders suffer alone." Sirius intoned quietly.

And suddenly Remus realised that never again would he collapse – he would only fall into waiting arms.

OOOOOOOO

**Sloth**

"Personally, I think a fifth house should be founded."

James yawned and stretched. "What for? We've already got Awesome, Slimy, Bookworms and Duffers."

"We need one for the lazy sods that don't do anything but sleep and drool all over their mate's essay." Remus poked the sleeping Sirius pointedly, "Sirius Black can be an honorary member right after I transfigure him into a sloth to represent his new house – once I master the spell, of course."

"I'll master you," came the garbled reply from the desk. Sirius ignored the laughter as he groggily wiped his drool off Remus' essay.

OOOOOOO

**Listen**

Rarely did James and Sirius listen in DADA as they were intelligent enough to simply skim read the content and pass. Besides, it was Moony's favourite subject so he was practically a walking, disturbingly enthusiastic book on the subject.

" _... Dark but moderately intelligent creatures such as werewolves and vampires rarely enjoy companionship as it is dangerous for humans to be around them, but there have been documented cases where they have taken well to animal companionship, making them less aggressive. However..."_

At these words, James caught Sirius' eye knowingly and, for once, they both listened intently in a class.

OOOOOOOO

**Fault**

The fire crackled merrily as Remus looked up from his book to watch Peter clap excitedly when James' gobstone squirted liquid up Sirius' nose.

He chuckled at Sirius' roar and pulled his feet up out of the way when Sirius tackled James and rolled across the common room floor with him. He knew that his three friends had their own faults – rather big ones if the teachers and Lily Evans were to be believed – but Remus was happy to overlook them. For once in his life, he had friends who accepted him, his own faults and all.

OOOOOOOO

**Home**

Summer had arrived and Sirius returned home. But he couldn't help wondering why he felt so lonely and unloved if this was really home. He missed Hogwarts, he missed his friends, pranks, lessons and even Snivellus' greasy face if it meant hexing him.

His parents treated him like grime on their shoe, if they weren't ignoring him, and his brother became distant and so much like their parents that Sirius found himself arguing with them all constantly. They locked him in his room to count down the days until his third year at Hogwarts; until he could return home.


	3. Third Year

OOOOOOO

**Pronunciation**

"_Exsto Lilium_."

"_Eggso Lilum_. Got it."

"No, hold on, James. _Ex-sto Lil-i-um_. And don't move your wand like that – you'll poke her eye out."

"_Exsto Lilium_. Yeah, I've got this, Remus. You just watch and learn, lads."

...

"Well, it wasn't a lily... but he still transfigured something, right?" Sirius slouched against the wall in the Hospital Wing as he addressed Remus, "What was it, anyway?"

"He said _Ilium_ instead of _Lilium_. The pronunciation is all important – he dropped a pelvic bone into Lily's soup."

"Ah, I guess that's why he's now covered in pus-filled warts."

OOOOOOOOO

**Resist**

As the dark room slowly came into focus, Remus registered the familiar clinging stickiness of sheets and hastily threw them off, ashamed. Cheeks burning, although no one was awake to see him, he cleaned himself up with a spell and desperately tried to convince himself that the dream that had seemed so pleasant, was filled with soft, curvy bodies of girls, instead of the firm muscles of boys.

He had to resist this one more abnormality – it _had_ to be a phase because he didn't want to think about what it might mean if the dreams and desires remained.

OOOOOOOOO

**Ghosts**

"Alright, so you feel sadness and happiness, right?"

The Gryffindor ghost drew himself up haughtily. "Yes, I may be dead but contrary to popular belief, I am still _human_."

Sirius waved this aside impatiently. "But you don't feel pain."

A transparent lip twitched. "No."

"Alright, you can't physically feel, but if you thought of something like... oh, I don't know what ghosts find wank worthy – the Ravenclaw ghost starkers, for example, would you be horny in your mind even though you couldn't get a stiffy?"

It was three years before Nearly Headless Nick spoke to the Black heir again.

OOOOOOOOOO

**Search**

Dust burst from the old, thick books, getting into the sniffling noses of the three boys and making their eyes water. The floor of their dormitory was covered in books that were put under enchantments and hidden under beds while Remus was around, but Remus was in the Hospital Wing recovering from the full moon.

Tired, determined eyes scanned the yellowed pages, searching for hints, any directions on how to do this.

"I think I found it!"

James triumphantly held up the book, _So You Want To Be An Animal?_, and they gathered around. Finally, their searching was over.

OOOOOOOOOO

**Company**

Remus tried not to be disappointed. Of course, Sirius, James and Peter wouldn't spend their every waking minute with him, he knew that, but he couldn't help feeling a little lonely when the three claimed they had detentions or catch up work to do together.

Luckily, he found company in an unexpected form.

Sometimes he felt guilty for befriending the girl James was convinced that he would one day marry, even though she wouldn't even talk to him. But he liked Lily's company, and she seemed to like his, so he kept just this one secret from his friends.

OOOOOOO

**Squirm**

Peter wriggled in his seat, unable to stop shifting side to side.

"Stop squirming!" Sirius growled from beside him, trying not to laugh, but knowing that it could blow their cover.

McGonogall swept past and James pointedly transformed his rat into a goblet. She nodded approvingly and moved on, temporarily not noticing how Peter was wriggling too much to transfigure anything. James shot them a look as Remus glanced over curiously, and Peter froze.

"Just stay still."

"I can't!" Peter hissed at Sirius, "You've no idea what it's like having your own rat's tail squirming around inside your shorts!"


	4. Fourth Year

OOOOOOO

**Burn**

Sirius watched silently as smoke curled from the fresh burn on the tapestry. He yearned to reach out to touch the place where sweet, strong Andromeda's name used to be, but he knew that his fingers would burn, just as his skin burned where his mother's frequent stinging hexes left the skin unmarred but left deeper, worse scars.

But Sirius' heart burned too, with a fire that his cousin had told him never to lose. It protected him from the cold of his family and gave him the resolve to become another black mark on the Black family tree.

OOOOOOOOO

**Diary**

_Dear Diary, _

_I can't believe I actually have a diary – really, it makes me even more of a ponce, something that I'd be ashamed of if I didn't already consider Sirius Black the sexiest man alive. I just know he'd be a complete animal! The thought is just too much for me, I must go think of that wonderful man ravishing me and wank in the shower because I'm too fussy to do it in bed like normal blokes. _

_Love forever, IckleMoonykins._

"For the last time, Sirius, stay away from my things! And it's a notebook, _not_ a diary!"

OOOOOOOO

**Coward**

It was an accident.

They'd sneaked into Forbidden Forest for ingredients for a prank, Sirius and James going ahead while Remus and Peter looked for Knotgrass by a frozen pond. Peter tried to cross the ice and later, when he awoke in the Hospital Wing, he was told that he'd fallen through and Remus had jumped in after him, even though his warming charms were abysmal. Remus had almost died carrying him back to safety, but the werewolf only smiled at him from his own Hospital bed.

"That's what friends do, Pete."

Peter knew then that he didn't belong.

OOOOOOOO

**Puddle**

Sirius watched as a pea shot up James' nose after he'd likened Remus' eyes to muddy puddles. James hadn't appreciated Remus' snort at his description of Lily's eyes as 'the first green shoot of spring', but it had gotten Sirius thinking.

Remus' eyes weren't like muddy puddles – they were softer, warmer. They were leather bound books, crackling fireplaces, sweet chocolate and racing through dark forests illuminated by moonlight. Eyes that were sweet caramel when Remus was content and rich gold when the wolf ruled him.

But Sirius, not wanting vegetables shoved up his nose, kept these thoughts to himself.

OOOOOOO

**Pudding**

"You're grinning. What have you done now?"

"Nothing." _Only been the first Marauder to half transform into my Animagus form last night. Now who's Minny's Transfiguration prodigy, Jamiekins?!_ Sirius continues to grin at Remus before noticing something.

"You've got pudding on your face."

"Oh." Remus tries and fails to wipe it away.

"No, here."

Sirius doesn't know what makes him do it but later he'll exclaim loudly to James that it was just his Animagus form taking over.

Even Remus thinks it's a little... dog-like the way Sirius leaned over and enthusiastically licked the pudding off his cheek.

OOOOOOOO

**Lovestruck**

Remus listens silently as James loudly retells his terrific capture of the Snitch in the winning match against Slytherin. Remus is happy for his friend and for Gryffindor but he inwardly wishes that James and Peter would be quiet.

Then he realises that Lily is sitting nearby with her friends and he wonders what it was about love that makes people act like idiots.

But then Sirius is flopping down beside him, soaking wet, grinning and telling him that even the squid can't keep its tentacles off him, and Remus laughs because he'll never mind listening to _this_ idiot.

OOOOOOOOO

**Badger**

That year, Hufflepuff's greatest mistake was winning a Quidditch match against Gryffindor.

James and Sirius were convinced that they'd cheated and while Remus thought this plausible by the impossible way that the players had predicted each other's moves, he also thought his friends could be slightly sore losers. But he would never tell them that and, as usual, he only made a show of offering light disapproval.

He was easily convinced to help his friends plan their revenge and laughed along with the rest of the school when bewildered badgers replaced the students at the Hufflepuff table at breakfast.

OOOOOOOOO

**Art**

This year was Bellatrix's seventh year and Sirius gathered the Marauders to give her a fitting farewell. He knew he'd get hell for it at home but they despised him there anyway and he'd given up on his family long ago.

So he and the other Marauders watched with baited breath at the Farewell Feast as every soft food within sight flung itself at the Slytherin table. Sirius barked his laughter as Bellatrix screamed with rage, covering in a disturbing mix of coloured goo and Sirius thought for a fleeting moment that the splatters of chaos looked like art.


End file.
